Showing posts with label anxiety. Show all posts
Showing posts with label anxiety. Show all posts

Friday, 10 March 2017

My First Talk to Cardiac Rehab for 2017

This week I gave my first talk for the year to our local cardiac rehab unit. July will be ten years since my heart attack and triple bypass and have been privileged since 2008 to have been invited as part of the education program to talk to people who are now doing the rehab program as they start their journey after a heart event. 


I divided my talk today into three areas: I started off talking a bit about my heart event, the fact I did not have any of the classic warning signs or symptoms which I later found out was not uncommon for diabetics (amongst other groups in the community) - and mentioned that I am very passionate about spreading information about this whenever I get the opportunity.

The second part of my talk focused on my dealing with anxiety, depression, denial and the emotional headgames I went through in the months after my heart attack and during my recovery period. I talked about the positive role that cardiac rehab played in my recovery and also mentioned how at a certain point I reached out to one of the social workers from the program when I found things were a bit too much for me.

In the second part of my talk I also mentioned the importance of finding a hobby, an interest and talked a bit about how I rediscovered photography whilst helping my wife looking after injured wildlife (she was involved in Wildcare at the time) - where we live we have lots of wild birds visit us daily so I had many natural subjects of which to take photos. And I talked about how I have progressed my interest in photography to taking photos of live shows and tribute bands here on the Gold Coast.

In the third part of my talk I concentrated on how and what I did to change my lifestyle - stopped smoking, started exercising regularly, learnt how to deal with stress and improve my diet. I mentioned that it was my opinion that before anyone can begin their new journey after a heart event and make changes they needed to first assess where they were when they had their heart event and ascertain what parts of their lifestyle they needed to change or adjust.

All in all was a very good session with 28 people in attendance including the group co-ordinator, the unit's psychologist and a couple of university students doing a placement.

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In 2008, a year after my heart attack I was invited to give a “one-off” talk at the cardiac rehab unit on the Gold Coast. This happened not long after I had given a number of interviews for TV and our local newspaper in which I was asked about my heart event and my experience dealing with 29 cardioversions/resuscitations and having three stents for a 100% blockage to the right coronary artery and then five days later, a triple bypass for blockages on the left side of the heart.


"29 Lives" - TV Interview with Channel Nine - October 15, 2008
Click on photo to see interview on You Tube


Saturday, 19 November 2016

Going forward after a heart attack/event

A couple of weeks ago I was asked to be an administrator on a Heart Support group on Facebook. At first I was hesitant realizing I don't have the time that I once had to spend on Facebook and also because I wasn't truly sure what was expected of me in this role. I was subsequently told that what was required was positive posts to help those doing it tough and to cover what I did during my recovery period and how I dealt with depression, anxiety, panic attacks etc.

Masters of Rock Show

Anyway, a week or so later I found myself added as an admin to this group and apart from a post introducing myself and another one reminding people that November is Diabetes Awareness month, I wrote a post yesterday which I repeat below.
"When I was asked to join this group as an administrator I wasn't too sure what to expect, nor was I sure of what was expected of me. Jean, as I understood it, saw my role as posting positive items about things I have done over the years since my heart attack and triple bypass back in 2007 but finding the time to actually sit down and write something has not been easy due to always seeming to be busy. But today I have decided to change that and post something, probably spurred on by events of this and recent weeks.

Depression was part and parcel of my recovery period and still continues today, 9+ years on. Dealing with this back then was a challenge and remained so for around a year after my heart attack. Helping my wife look after injured wildlife helped me but rediscovering photography probably was the main thing to get me to start thinking positively.

Living where we live in the Gold Coast hinterland in Queensland, Australia with an abundance of wildlife (birds) visiting us daily provided me with no shortage of ready made subjects to photograph. This is an activity I continue to do today on an almost daily basis.

Rainbow Lorikeet

Along the way I also found I had time to listen to music again, something that had fallen by the wayside over the years due to work, family and all that sort of thing. And then three or so years ago my wife and I discovered tribute bands where we live.


The natural progression for me was to challenge myself to take photos of live shows, teaching myself the skills and the required techniques. In recent months I was asked by one of the largest clubs up here to take photos of their shows (did two last weekend) and me being me agreed to do it not for payment but in exchange for tickets to the shows for me and my wife.

PINK tribute show

Then last week I was asked to do some promo shots for a local group for a small payment and this morning received a phone call asking me to do photos at a show tomorrow night - sadly, can't do this one as since my heart attack I don't travel far at night and this one is over an hour away (they are looking to see if someone is coming from our area who could give me a lift).

And today I received confirmation to shoot another show in three weeks time.

So, what started as a hobby has now developed into something a bit more serious but more importantly, it is something I thoroughly enjoy doing, and may develop into a form of income, albeit small.

Now why have I written all of this? Because I believe it is of paramount importance for those of us who are finding it hard to cope after a heart attack (or any life threatening disease) to find a hobby. I say as much when I give talks to our local cardiac rehab unit which I have been doing since 2008 and I say the same when I give a talk on behalf of our Heart Foundation for which I am a volunteer speaker.

So for those of you who, like me, found they were unable to go back to work or a full-time job, that does not mean that life has come to an end. Now, during the recovery period, is a great time to rediscover an old interest and maybe develop it into something more.

And I do understand that saying the above can be easier said than done but we have to realize that giving up should never be an option.

Happy to respond to questions or comments but as I am not on the computer all the time, my replies may not be instantaneous."

My Facebook page featuring wildlife photos I have taken: https://www.facebook.com/Wildlifeinnerang/posts/1109641512489326

More photos from shows I have shot can be viewed on FLICKR at: https://www.flickr.com/photos/paradisephotos/albums


 Pheasant Coucal

 Kookaburra

King Parrot

Sulphur Crested Cockatoo

Galah (Rose Breasted Cockatoo)

Pale Headed Rosella

Indian Ringneck

ABBA tribute show

QUEEN tribute show

Eagles Tribute show

Elvis tribute artist Dean Z


Masters of Rock Show

Saturday, 16 January 2016

Dealing with Depression, Anxiety and Panic Attacks after a Heart Attack

The recovery process after a heart attack varies from person to person. How people deal with the "ups and downs" during this period is not the same for everyone.

For me, I found rediscovering an old hobby, photography, went a long way to helping me deal with depression, anxiety and panic attacks. I talk about this when I give talks at our local cardiac rehab group which is what I did just a couple of days ago at my first presentation for 2016.


Depression and anxiety after a heart attack is not uncommon and but talking about it is something people are usually reluctant to do. My raising these issues from the standpoint of someone who has been through the process usually is the stepping-stone for some present to open up and talk about what is bothering them as they start their road to recovery after their heart event.

I usually start the discussion off along the lines that it was rediscovering photography that helped me deal with many months of depression and anxiety after my heart attack and bypass surgery in 2007. I explain that at the time of my heart attack my wife was involved in looking after injured wildlife and that now, having free time on my hands, I soon started helping my wife. I go on to explain that where we live we have lots of wildlife that visit us daily and that picking up a camera and starting to take photos soon became a daily activity.



A few years ago I created a Facebook page where I could feature some of my photos where I continue to feature photos of various wildlife that visit us where we live in the Gold Coast hinterland in Queensland, Australia - https://www.facebook.com/Wildlifeinnerang/


In my talks I suggest to people that their recovery period is an opportunity for them to rediscover or pick up a hobby that maybe they have not thought about for years be it knitting, gardening, cooking, tennis, golf, swimming, etc.

Having introduced the topic at last Thursday’s talk, two people present told how cooking has become an important part of their lives and another person talked about getting involved in designing.

In my talk on Thursday I added that in addition to my photography which I am still passionately involved in, a second activity I undertake on a daily basis is walking (exercise). Not only does it help me with my diabetes (and my heart) whenever I feel “down” or an episode of depression coming, I explained to the group that simply going for a walk usually helps me deal with the issue.




Tuesday, 12 January 2016

Presenting at Cardiac Rehab

Honoured to have been asked by our local cardiac rehab unit to once again be part of their education programme in 2016. First session this year is in two days time.



In 2008, a year after my heart attack I was invited to give a “one-off” talk at the cardiac rehab unit on the Gold Coast. This happened not long after I had given a number of interviews for TV and our local newspaper in which I was asked about my heart event and my experience dealing with 29 cardioversions/resuscitations and having three stents for a 100% blockage to the right coronary artery and then five days later, a triple bypass for blockages on the left side of the heart.





Being asked to present to people doing cardiac rehab about how I coped with my heart attack and subsequent depression, anxiety and panic attacks was something I embraced without hesitation and was something that I can now look back on that helped me deal with these issues – to say this was cathartic would be an understatement.

After this “one-off” talk I was asked to become a “regular” part of the cardiac rehab programme and was more than happy to accept this request - this was in late 2008.

Now, going on eight years after my first talk, I will be continuing with my presentations and although the format has changed over the years, my experiences have not and sharing these with those present at each session is something I thoroughly enjoy – it is indeed gratifying seeing people in front of you nodding in agreement when you make a point or comment on an experience you have been through and it tells you that you are “connecting” and that what you are talking about is relevant.

Of particular interest is when I talk about my diabetes and my need to be aware of this and the impact of this insidious disease on the heart – you can see straight away who amongst those present also deals with diabetes by their reactions to what I am saying.

Another topic I cover is memory loss and forgetfulness, two issues I had to deal with and issues that are often brought up during one of my talks.



Probably the most significant thing about my being part of the rehab education programme is that I have had a heart attack and bypass surgery and have actually been through the cardiac rehab programme itself. Unlike the staff (except for one person I am aware of) I am the only presenter who can speak from first-hand experience and I truly believe that this is so very important when offering a rehab programme.


So as 2016 begins I look forward to giving my first talk in two day’s .




Sunday, 29 November 2015

Claustrophobia and Bypass Surgery

One of the first things I noticed a few months after my heart attack and triple bypass surgery in July, 2007 was a problem I had going into elevators and confined spaces. It first happened a couple of months after my surgery when my wife and I travelled to Twin Towns club to see a show and we had to take the elevator from the ground floor to the sixth floor where the auditorium was located.

  
Now this was not the first time we had been to this club to see a show and certainly was not the first time we had taken the crowded elevator up to the floor where the show was taking place. However, it most definitely was the first time, as we were standing at the back of the full elevator, that a feeling of “dread” consumed me and I felt like screaming and collapsing and could feel my heart racing.

My wife could see what was happening, it was that obvious I guess.

In short, I felt like I was having a panic attack and it wasn’t nice. In fact this was the first of what was to be a series of such attacks any time I went into an elevator or found myself in a confined space like in the back of a coffee shop or even sitting between two people in the back seat of a car.

That feeling also reared its ugly head during the show itself, a Wickety Wak show from memory - we were seated in the middle of a row in a full house and that feeling of being surrounded and "cramped in" was both new and difficult to cope with.

As I soon found out, this feeling of claustrophobia/panic attack/anxiety became the norm and occurred when we went to the movies or to see a show at any venue. I learnt very quickly when booking tickets for a show to book aisle seats.

And this feeling of an impending anxiety attack still happens today when we go to the movies or to see a show eight years later!

I can distinctly remember on one occasion when I took the train from where I live on the Gold Coast up to Brisbane how I had to go through “mind control” and deep breathing exercises to overcome that terrible feeling of a panic attack coming on whilst sitting in the “confined” space of a train car.

When this first happened I did some research and asked around and even asked other people who had gone through bypass surgery if they had had similar experiences and asked them if they understood what I was talking about.

To be truthful, not everyone knew what I was referring to but there were some who did which, I guess, made me feel like I was not crazy and not the only one dealing with these issues.

I also mentioned this to my cardiologist and he confirmed that this was not knew for what people like me had been through: heart attack, multiple cardioversions and of course open-heart surgery/triple bypass.

Knowing this was helpful, dealing with it was the challenge and as I said above, I had to develop techniques to cope which included deep breathing and “concentration” exercises to help me take my mind off the problem.

In early 2011 following heart related issues my cardiologist ordered me to have a CT angiogram and I can clearly remember today, 4+ years later how I just about freaked out when they l lay me down and I started to go through the tunnel, twice they had to pull me out before I could complete the test.



And a year later in 2012 I had a similar bad experience when I needed a CT scan for lower back/spine issues to determine what was causing me severe lower back pain. This happened again earlier this year when I again needed a SPECT CT scan on my back.

My biggest challenge came three years later in October, 2010 when I had to fly interstate. The thought of this scared me and even though it was enough to just about bring on a panic attack. I took the flight. I remember I really had trouble coping and whilst it may not have been obvious to those around me on the plane, I know inside myself I was anxious and really struggling to keep it together.


Over time I thought, hoped, this would get better and I guess it did, however, three years later in January, 2013 I had to fly interstate for one of my children’s weddings. The whole process began again and the “fear of flying” became real. The flight was twice as long as the one a few years earlier and I was fearful I was going to have issues again.

This time I planned ahead. I made sure I had aisle seats so that I would not have that “cramped in” feeling sitting against the window if the flight was full. I also decided that this time I would take a valium to help calm me down. Doing this definitely helped.

Now, a few years later I am preparing for another interstate flight and part of me is dreading this. Sure, things have improved a lot since my surgery in 2007 but that fear is still there. I have booked aisle seats so this is taken care of and I will no doubt take a Valium before the flights and I am sure everything will be fine, however, best to be prepared as I was taught in the Boy Scouts.

Dealing with the after effects of a heart attack and bypass surgery is one thing, coping with these in addition to dealing with additional medical issues including diabetes, thyroid and respiratory conditions can most certainly make life challenging.


This is a link to an interesting article that deals with this question of Claustrophobia and Bypass Surgery: http://www.canada.com/story.html?id=b9cffbea-8c7f-4f9e-a2eb-0614bfd42b4d

Claustrophobia link to heart bypass: study

Canadian researchers have uncovered what seems like a bizarre side effect of a common operation, finding many heart-bypass patients experience severe claustrophobia after their surgery.

Sunday, 1 March 2015

Second Cardiac Rehab Talk for 2015

On Thursday, I gave my second talk for the year to our local cardiac rehab unit with 23 people in attendance. Whilst setting up before the presentation a lady came over smiling and to say hello and introduce herself and remind me she was the person who co-ordinated a talk I gave for Heart Foundation to her local Probus group in July, 2012.

I told her I most definitely remembered that talk where she introduced me to the crowd of over 80 people who attended that day and I told her, to this day, it was one of my most satisfying talks. Apparently her husband had a bad asthma attack in December, not a heart attack, when they discovered he had some severe blockages that required a triple bypass hence here being there today with her husband. It was good to see both of them today and to see how well her husband is doing on his road to recovery.


As usually happens, people came up to me afterwards to ask questions and one was from the wife of someone who also had bypass surgery and was having issues with concentration, reading and memory. We talked a bit about this and I mentioned something called Postperfusion syndrome (also known as Pumphead) which is not unusual for someone who has had bypass surgery. She was worried, and rightly so, that it was something out of the norm and I tried to reassure her it is not unusual and it might be a good idea for both of them to have a chat with their GP or cardiologist where she could get a better explanation. I told her I am not a doctor and am not qualified to talk more about this condition but suggested she could also bring this up with one of the wonderful staff at cardiac rehab.


Another person who himself has previously had heart issues was there today with his wife who is now dealing with the after effects of a heart event and who is in denial and has a bit of dementia. He really was looking for understanding and support as I had brought up my issues dealing with depression and anxiety after my heart attack and during my recovery. Again, I referred him to the CR staff.

Still another person asked me how long it took for me to feel '100%'. My answer was simply we are all different and we all heal at a different pace after bypass surgery. I told him that I still have issues with fatigue and lack of stamina but told him I also deal with T2 diabetes, a thyroid condition, sleep apnoea and angina and that it is not unusual two or three or even four times a week for me to have an afternoon nap.


Another person brought up the question of the need for people 'like us' who have been through the process getting into schools and talking to high school kids about what has happened to us, in many cases, as a result of poor lifestyle choices - smoking, alcohol, drugs, lack of exercise, poor diet etc. This is a topic which has always been close to my heart (pun intended) and something I wanted to see implemented by a heart support group I was involved in setting up in late 2008. Unfortunately, others in the group did not see this as a priority.

Having left that group and then becoming involved in our Heart Foundation as a volunteer speaker I was asked last year to give a talk to one of our local high schools and over 70 students were in attendance. The impact of someone who has been through process of a heart attack and bypass surgery should not be underestimated on the impressionable minds of teenagers and is why I believe it is so important for 'survivors', if they are up to it, to get involved in this sort of activity as well as sharing their experience with their family, children, grandchildren, church, social and sporting clubs and work colleagues.

All in all, the day's talk went very well and I look forward to the next one in April.

Talk given in Sep, 2011

Saturday, 17 January 2015

First Cardiac Rehab Talk for 2015

Gave my first talk for the year at our cardiac rehab unit a couple of days ago. Twenty-two in attendance and Evelyn (my wife) joined in after she finished with an appointment in the same building re: her breast cancer surgery follow-up.


After my talk the floor was opened to questions and the first one that came up was about heart support groups. I did my spiel about local groups and also talked about Facebook (and SURVIVORS, one of the groups I am a member of) to some people who came up to me after the talk for more information). That was well received. Click on the name SURVIVORS and you will be taken to the group page.

SURVIVORS - should you know of anyone who may benefit from a support group online this is one on Facebook you may wish to consider. This is a closed group so all discussions, conversations, questions are private and not shared in a public way.

Another group I mentioned is Heart Attack and Stents which is also a private, closed group as is another group called Zipper Club.

There is no right or wrong group and there are plenty of places on the internet and on Facebook where people can turn to to share experiences following a heart event and to ask questions but people must always remember that members of these groups are not doctors and that medical advice should only be sought from their specialist or family doctor.

Another question that came up asked about dealing with depression and anxiety and I talked about my experiences and denial and talked about my coming around to seeing a social worker where I could vent instead of taking things out on Evelyn.


Another person brought up an issue that he was having re: sleep apnoea and the run around he was getting from specialists and doctors and his frustration (which was obvious from his voice) trying to get a CPAP machine but his not getting any help. Was able to talk about this a bit as I am going through this process at the moment via our public health system.


And another topic that was discussed dealt with rediscovering old hobbies like photography for me, being negative and the need to recognize what we might have been doing wrong that led up to our having a heart attack in the first place like diet, exercise, smoking and dealing with stress - i.e. lifestyle changes.
a photo I took of one our wildlife visitors where we live

All in all was great session today and of course I covered my 'favourite' topic re: diabetics not necessarily having the classic warning signs of symptoms leading up to and/or when having a heart attack.


Saturday, 20 December 2014

Breathing Issues

For as long as I can remember, I have had issues with breathing. When I was young I would constantly have a blocked nose/sinus problems and from a very young age started using nasal sprays, decongestants with anti-histamines to alleviate the problem.

I used to think that possibly my issues were related to hay fever or pollens in the air but that really did not account for my having the blocked nose problem at any given time of the year, winter, spring, summer or autumn/fall.

At one stage I did those pin prick tests for allergies with nothing of significance being detected. On another occasion I thought I might have a deviated septum although I never really got that checked out. I was told my condition was not related to asthma.

I used to surf a lot and found that the salt water tended to help. I can remember as a child my mother giving me inhalations which also tended to help. However, the problem never really went away.

As I grew older I would depend more and more on my nasal spray and never left home or traveled without it. I was warned many times not to use the spray more than 5-7 days in a row but I guess it would be fair to say that fell on death ears given this was usually the only way I could get relief and fall asleep.

At age 21 I took up smoking which no doubt more than likely only aggravated the problem.

This went on for years, through my teens, when I moved from Sydney to Melbourne and then later to Israel where even there I still had the same problem although it must be said the problem seemed to diminish somewhat living in Jerusalem where the heat is a lot drier and there was significantly less humidity.

On returning to Melbourne, Australia a number of years later the problem continued although with hindsight I can say that in Melbourne the problem seemed to have less impact as it did when I lived in Melbourne previously - possibly due to the fact there is less humidity there and the summer heat tends to be drier as compared to Sydney.

So life continued. I left Melbourne after a family breakup, moved back to Sydney where humidity can be horrendous and the blocked nose problem continued. Then later I moved to the Gold Coast in Queensland where the weather is tropical and with it comes high humidity. And the nose problem continued, and probably worsened.

I found my greatest relief would come from air-conditioning with cooler air and some of the moisture being taken out of the air.

Life continued with me smoking and using a nasal decongestant spray just about everyday.

Then in 2007 I had a massive heart attack. Whether the fact that I had Graves Disease and later was diagnosed with T2 diabetes contributed to the heart attack, I can only guess with an answer of YES! Whether smoking contributed? well I can only comment that I am sure it did.

Did my having many interrupted nights of sleep due to breathing issues contribute to my heart event, with hindsight and having read up on this since my heart attack, I am convinced that there was a relationship.

Through all this I continued to use a nasal decongestant spray although I should add the night of my heart attack I gave up smoking and have not had one since!


After my heart attack I had issues with anxiety and panic attacks and many times found I was struggling to breathe, to take oxygen in into my lungs. I was told that this was common for people like me who had had a heart attack and subsequent bypass surgery - nice to hear but didn't really solve the problem. As these attacks seemed to present mostly at night when I went to bed and would often prevent me from falling to sleep, I took to taking half a valium tablet which seemed to help.

I also had issues with going into a lift, especially if it was full, and would experience panic attacks in these situations.

In the first couple of years after my bypass surgery I did a couple of lung function tests to determine if there was a problem there. None were found. My medications were checked to see if possibly they might be causing a problem.

I was sent up to Brisbane to do a V02 Max test to check my lung capacity and again, no issue was found. Thoughts of COPD went through my mind but I was told this was not a concern.

VO2 Max Test

At some stage I was put on an inhaler called Symbicort 400 which it must be said seemed to improve my oxygen intake and after a year or so I stopped taking this as my lung issue seemed to have resolved itself. As this problem disappeared so did the incidence of anxiety attacks seem to lessen.

It would be fair to say that my lung issue, the actual taking in of breath was now no longer an issue although on occasion it would crop up again and I would use the Symbicort and it would resolve itself within a few days.

Whilst this was going on I was still using a nasal decongestant spray just about every night and sometimes during the day.

Now, over seven years after my heart attack my breathing issues have definitely deteriorated and the nasal decongestant spray is virtually of no assistance. I again started having issues lying down to go to sleep and struggled to breathe through my nose and on occasion would have panic attacks again and sometimes have trouble getting oxygen into my lungs. I bought some nose cones on eBay which helped having tried nose strips before this with minimal success.

Last year, after a two year wait to see an ENT specialist, I saw a doctor who determined that I have turbinate hypertrophya not unusual condition in older people and that surgery maybe indicated if the condition worsens. He put me on a steroid spray (Nasonex) and for eleven months I used this and a saline nasal spray to help with my problem. During this period I did not use a nasal decongestant spray but that changed about six weeks ago when I just couldn't cope anymore but it must be said the decongestants spray is having virtually no effect anymore.


Earlier this year I did a sleep test which determined I have mild sleep apnoea. I did a follow-up test to see if one of those machines would help but was unable to complete the test due to having a panic attack trying to sleep with the mask over my face.


I was referred to our hospital's sleep clinic and last month saw a specialist there and am now waiting for an appointment at the respiratory clinic which is scheduled for May next year with a view to ascertaining my issue and the impact it is having on my heart and diabetes - surgery is on the cards.

In the meantime I am struggling at night, sometimes taking a valium to at least get some sleep and all the time worrying about the impact the lack of quality sleep is having on my diabetes which no doubt is impacting on my heart and possibly contributing to some of my angina issues.

I decided to write the above after yet again another night of interrupted sleep seeing me get up at 3.30am in the morning with breathing issues. Thought it relevant to put down in writing what I have been dealing with for months, years knowing that I can not be the only person who has these issues to contend with on a day to day basis.